Who even invented the idea of being "best friends"? Why bother? I mean, there are a lot of different people out there, why not just be friends with a load of them and all get along? Why choose ONE person to always be friends with, of the same sex, who you designate as having to always be there and always agree with you and look after you more than the other friends you have?
Don't get me wrong, I have a lot of good friends that I have met over time and kept in contact with. One of them is my boyfriend, another I have known since I was about 4 and there are other in between who I keep in contact online and love talking to, but none of them can be called my "best friend". People are too different!
My housemates have had me thinking I was unfortunate for not making one of these "best friends" at University. I live with five other girls, four of which I lived with last year and I was friends with the year before that. One I even shared a room with in the first year! Despite all this I barely feel like a good friend to them. They have separated into their own little couples which have sort of stuck right up until this point... the fifth girl I've only really started to get to know so can't be ranted about (yet!)
So what do best friends do? Buy each other presents, go out shopping together, share food, talk about how their day went, have play fights, yell at each other, argue, slap, punch, pull hair, bite... ... did I lose you there? Well it's certainly how it seems sometimes...
Right now one of these couples is confusing me more than ever. Sure, girls are allowed to argue over things and have disagreements and fall out. That's fine. But when they feel so upset that as soon as the other 'half' appears their life feels miserable that would be the point at which you start thinking that maybe, just maybe, this isn't actually a good friendship. That you should take your focus elsewhere? Not for this girl.
Lisa told me when I came back early during the summer that she had a great holiday. Best time of her life and we had fun chatting and watching TV, but now that Stacey has come back everything's changed...
Just earlier today they argued about whether or not Stacey had been told about something. Stacey insisted she hadn't, but Lisa insisted just as strongly that she had. This continued for a while with me idly sipping a cup of tea. Lisa finally flailed a little and said;
"Okok, you win, ok?" I mean, seriously, is that really the sign of a strong friendship?
Then Stacey called her immature and Lisa muttered something about wanting to go home cos she hates this place and I was just left sat there shaking my head.
She's right, having to try to end an argument with a comment like that isn't the right way to go about it. Maybe an "Ok, I guess you didn't hear me" just to cool things down again, but making your point of feeling like you're made out to be wrong all the time in the middle of an argument is the wrong way to go about it... am I right about this? Am I just talking crazy?
In the mean time here I am. I live on the same floor as Lisa. I talk to her and give her hugs and check up on her when she's down. Does she bother talking to me or anything? No. She's polite, but doesn't seem all that keen about making better friends with me. Her loss. If no one care to keep in contact after Uni I won't be any worse off. I have my friends back at home to see if these guys turn out to be not much good! Just hope they don't kill each other any time soon, that's all...